Not easy at all

It is really becoming more and more confused for me. I seriously doubt my ability to handle all these things. What exactly should I need to do to keep up with growing pressure? What is expected of me in the working world? 

I'm stuck. I'm scared. I'm blur. 

Reasonable?

If I didn't write out what I feel, I feel ashamed and angry myself. It is a bored lousy day for me, because I don't has anything to do. I was thought went back home cos of the electricity but after half an hour, it been fixed. 

First of all, my senior doesn't give anything for me to work on. I don't know what she's doing. She just sits online, and chatting with the new gal. Second, most I was angry was the new colleague, who is now translating an article. That article, is me who translate it from Cantonese record to English version. Say what, she keeps complaining about it. Saying it's weird; it's like a bit bla bla bla... And my senior too, saying and laughing there. Just like doesn't care my feeling? SHE IS THE ONE ASKING ME TRANSLATE AS A DRAFT, NOT A REAL ARTICLE. Because SHE IS THE ONE WHO NEED TO WRITE THE INTERVIEW. 

Now, I feel like a crown, giving them laughing on me. Is it an intern easy being bully? Do you know that it is hard for me to listen to Cantonese. I assume that my mother tongue is Cantonese, but it doesn't mean that I' m pro in it. I already try my best to do it, but feel that I being laugh from a new gal that doesn't know how to respect others. Keep talking behind people back even though it is not me. 

I don't expect that my article is a very good article, and yours is a pro. Respect others, more important I also your colleague even though I'm an intern. 

  

I really can't stand the act from those people, who think that they are 'important character' here, acting in front of me, hurt my feeling, thinking them self too busy? Busy. I wonder what this word means. Busy, can chat, viewing friendster or even on the phone with sister. This is call busy? Now only I knew it. 

Now, they comment our sub-editor, saying about her works that doesn't work properly. A word, 'dog' came out from the new gal mouth. She likes wanted to argue with the sub-editor, words from her mouth is really impolite. And even use the boss name. A new gal behaving like a boss after two days.... -.- shame on her. The senior also the same. Maybe because she had been promoted to a manager position, now can show her power. They had spent one hour plus to argue the sub-editor. Says that busies for the coming issues, but can argue and wasted almost two hours doing immature behavior and all kids stuff. 

I had been sitting here early in the morning and still nothing for me to do. I really worry about my result, which will be given by those people. How am I going to face my result? 

   

Different between journalist and writer

For a whole night I had been thinking. 

A journalist is a writer? This is the question I been asked to my colleague. Am I being here as a journalist or a writer? 

Just early in the morning, I research the meaning in Wikipedia. And I just found that it has a big different between them. And similar to my intern now, I was a writer instead of a journalist. I do not saying myself as a journalist, as my duty and responsibility is different from a journalist job. 

A journalist is a person who practices journalism, gathering and dissemination of information about current events, trends, issues and people. It also as same type as reporters. Create reports as a profession for broadcast or publication in mass media ( eg: newspaper) Reporters find their sources for their works, their repots can be either spoken or written. (taken from wikipedia) 

Isn't it exciting and interesting to be a journalist? A journalist believes in reporting the real and true. 

A writer is anyone who creates written work, although the work are more usually designates those who write creatively or professional. In British Royal Navy, writer is the trade designation for an administrative clerk. ( taken from wikipedia) 

Isn't it a big different? Could a journalist write event though they did not even went for the event? The answer is Yes for a Writer but No for a Journalist. Therefore, I do not expect myself as a journalist. I still not qualification to be a journalist. 

Not fair

Early 9 am, my senior colleague phones me, asking me whether I arrived in office or not. I was like now only 9am, want me so early in office!!? I told her I on the way, taking bus. She says that another colleague want to bring me go event, so I was like okay. 

I reached office at 9.45 am and I thought I was late. But lucky, she is there, waiting me. I was happy because I can go for an event, no need to sit in the office. On the way going there, my colleague chat with me, saying about her problem. I just listen and say yes, oh, ic. 

Eventually, I was going back to office around 1.30pm. Today, we will have a new colleague came in. My colleague say this new girl is quite impolite. I don't know because I haven't met her. They coming in afternoon after going to the event. 

The first time I see her, I doesn't know how to describe. She doesn't say a 'Hi' to me even though I'm just a an intern. I feel that my senior colleagues treats her better than me. Maybe her friend. She told her everything and give her to follow her, but I was like sitting here doing nothing. I feel like I being ignored. I didn't even given any articles to write on and doing nothing. I can see the difference between her treats. 

I know that I can't say much as I'm just an intern, will leave soon compare to her that working with this company. I feel ignore, being unfair to me. All the works, they will ask her to do and I'm just sit here dreaming and sleepy =.= 

My first impression about her, I see her doesn't work seriously. Laughing and chatting here and there when the boss is not around. She wills just following the senior, standing there until she give her some works. My senior looks quite busy with her stuff. Saying that 'I'm so busy, the publication is nearer'.

But, all the time I here, she always chatting with MSN or phone talking. Asking me to write the entire article. She seems like very busy, and need to OT. But, I could feel that she just pretending. And today only I know, she promoted to a manager position. Wow,sitting in office, chatting, msn can be a manager. What a good job. 

My whole day in working,  sitting and online or blogging. I see them so busy, teaching her, and don't have anyone bother me. I'm being invisible. But, I will stand until my intern finish. It's only left a month and I'm sure I can handle it. I  must protect my CGPA. I really hope my intern will end ASAP. I really doesn't like here from the beginning. 

My worst sad birthday

Grats for being a year older. A very shiny, bright morning makes me feel so good today. A morning breakfast prepared by my dad and 2 red eggs from my mom. Am I dreaming? 

A Saturday afternoon should go out shopping or having a movie with friends, but I spend my whole day at home. Watching VCD, Huan Zhu Ge Ge again or playing games. 

It was quite fine the whole day. Until the time for dinner. When my sister came back from outing, we are planning to go out eat. Either going Per Point, Fatty Cheong and Shanghai Tian Restaurant for my celebration. 

But, when my sister says going to Fatty Cheong, my mom doesn't want it. Saying that the food there is not nice and I will vomit. Asking us to go without her. This is possible -.- I quite ok or anything as well as my family is together for a dinner. 

Around 7pm, my dad asks me what I want to eat as he go pack. I was so angry and upset, told him i wasn't hungry. Then my dad told my mom and they two argue. I was like. Could you two stop fighting on my birthday? 

Then, I go watch tv at my mom room. My mom came in, saying want to go eat or not. First I don't want, but at last, I change my clothes and prepare to go. But, my mom just sitting in front of the tv doing nothing. I know she doesn't want to go. I was so sad. 

Finally, I know that my birthday is the worst. I go cut my cake, without any wishing. I cry the whole night, crying for being treat like this by my own parents. I am not blaming for the eating or what, but why they like to argue. I know my birthday is not a big day, but all I wan is a normal family dinner. Why she doesn't feel what I need? 

When she make the 2 red eggs for me, it was the first time and I think I will have a great day today, but it turn out worse. I really feel sad and crying until my eyes become red. Now, I know that, I shouldn't happy and celebrate my birthday. It is more worse and I really sad thinking about it.

What will happen to Malaysia Politics?

The election results had giving us many problems. Barisan Nasional has returned to power, with a reduced majority compared to the 11th General Election in 2004. Losing the state governments of Kedah, Kelantan, Penang, Perak and Selangor. It was much worse results compared to other state. 

Many citizens, blaming the government for what they had did. The government had losing majority of the support from us. People include Chinese, Malay and Indian voters express their dissatisfaction in the election.Even, our beloved ex ministry, Tun Dr. Mahatir tells Pak Lah to step down from the PM, taking his responsibility for this terrible defeat. says that Malaysia will ruined from Pak Lah hands. Now, when I reading the Malaysiakini.com website, Ting Chew Peh from MCA, tells Ong Ka Ting to step down full responsibility for MCA disastrous in election. 

A big changes in the government after the election results. What will happen to our country? Shoud the government doing the right thing? Even though they saying that it was for our Malaysian own good? 

We, a democracy country, shall we have the rights to votes our own choice? Should the opposition side should giving a chance to involved in the parliamentary? Giving them a chance to contribute in our country.     

New government- new system?

Wake up people. Wake up. It is time for us to change, for our country to change, voice from the public due to the election results. People were expecting some new face to rule the states. The voting result is shocking me; BN fails to win two-third of parliamentary seats, losing five states. People are unhappy with BN and want change. 

The result from the election is shocking me. I don't expect that BN will lose so many seats. Is this means that we, as citizen no longer confident with our government? Is this what we want? Is this what we need? 

The most shocking me is that all Penang state had lost their seats to the Opposition. When I reading the newspaper, it seems that Malaysia politics will have a big change, like a Tsunami. What will happen to us? 

The Opposition had won five state from the BN, Kedah, Selangor, Kelantan, Penang and Perak. Actually, I only expect Kelantan will just lose to PAS, but the others four states as well lose to BN. Penang, majority of Chinese people, will lose to BN, winning by Opposition. DAP Lim Guan Eng will be the fourth chief minister replacing Tan Sri Dr Koh Tsu Koon.  Even my house area here, Lembah Pantai, PKR Nurul Izzah beat Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil. Now, Selangor also win by the oppostion. This may cause much political issue between BN and Opposition.

Hopefully, the new government will do some different after winning the election. I'm waiting the new system from them so that we as the citizen will get a better life.  

Election

A five years election that we been waiting so long is finally reach. Anyhow, I doesn't know any much of this kind of politics as I really not interested in it. For me, it was as usual, either vote for government (BN) or non-government. 

Since the election is coming for these few days, many campaign are around to gain more votes on the society. Lately, I been reading newspaper as much news about election as I can. Even though  I haven't register for my vote. Quite too late registering now. Should register for the next election -.-. Be a part of Malaysia citizen. 

Hopefully, this election, we will vote for our good. Think before you vote as it is our future.